sigelphoenix

Title: Director's Cut
Characters: the full Adamant Company and Garagos
Word Count: ~1400
Summary: When the lights go down on the final episode, what does the cast do?
Notes: Be warned that this is very silly.

"Cut! That’s a wrap, folks!"

The moment the cameras stopped recording and the stage lights turned off, Garagos sat up and yanked ‘Unfettered’ out of his chest. "I’ll have you know you swung this much harder than necessary," he admonished, shaking the prop sword for emphasis. Its rubber blade wobbled. "A truly skilled actor could create the verisimilitude of heroic strength without resorting to actual brute force." The inflection he placed on the second to last word left no doubt as to his opinion on unnecessary physicality.

Nexus rolled her eyes, the gesture visible even through her opaque red contact lenses. "Quit your bitching, Garagos," she replied. "You’re lucky McNeil is able to edit the footage so your limp-wristed ‘swordfighting’ won’t come off as completely gay."

"Did you - you did not -" Garagos sputtered. "I cannot believe you used that word in a negative manner! And I do believe you referred to my legitimate creative criticism with a term that is derogatory toward women."

"Oh, suck my -"

Buran cleared his throat and pointed. "Nexus, the jar," he said sternly.

"Motherfucker." Nexus dug around in her ‘adamantine’ suit for change, then dropped a quarter into a jar. "For Nexus’ Peccadillos" was written neatly in pen on the label. In pencil, an X was crossed over the words, with "My fuckups" scrawled in their place.

Buran cleared his throat again. "Two words, two quarters, young woman," he said, then shook his head. "I am very disappointed in you."

"Fine, whatever." Nexus chucked another coin in. "I just want to get out of this suit. My tits are killing me."

"Try wearing six extra arms," Garagos interjected. "Do you know the amount of sweat that collects in -"

"Stuff it, princess."

Garagos gasped, glared, and stalked off the set.

"Are those two at it again?" Anora asked, coming onto the set from the ‘temple’ entrance. "I could hear them in the Red Falcon Green Room."

"Really?" Luth drawled, sidling over to her and slipping an arm around her waist. "I forget anything else is going on whenever I see your baby blues, sweetheart."

Anora blushed and leaned on Luth’s shoulder, and when he pinched her butt she dissolved into giggles.

"That ass up for anyone to grab, sweetcheeks?"

"Levanter!" Buran scolded, pushing the man away from Anora, who looked wide-eyed and unsure of how to respond to the attention. "Stop being so uncouth. Honestly, I can’t believe Mr. McNeil hired you to play an angel."

Levanter spread his hands nonchalantly, then slid off his blond wig, rubbing the stubbled scalp underneath. "It’s all about the skills, baby. I don’t gotta be a real angel, and Lyson don’t gotta summon real demons." One of his hands came up to his mouth to stifle a belch.

"But I do -" Lyson began plaintively, before being cut off by Sid.

"Do you think that was good enough? I’m not sure it was good enough. I know Mr. McNeil said ‘cut,’ but what if he’s just disappointed in us and gave up for the day? This is such a big finale ... I saw so many fans talking about their high expectations on the message boards ..." Sid was wringing his hands together nervously, his gaze darting around to his fellow actors. "I really need this boost for my career, you know - my agent says that a guy my age can’t count on playing the heartthrob for much longer."

"You’re twenty-six, Sidrick," Buran soothed, petting the shorter man’s shoulder. "Just shave the beard; you’ll look like a teenager again."

"This is turning into way too much of a downer for me," Luth said, breaking off from nuzzling Anora’s neck. He turned to head out the door, one arm still around his girlfriend. "Call me for the cast party," he called without turning around, one hand raised in a casual farewell.

From her seated position on the floor, Lyaera sighed dramatically at Luth’s exit, resting her chin in her hand. "Mr. Feragon is, like, so dreamy," she cooed. "I wish I’d been hired earlier, so he would’ve met me before Anora." She tilted her head in thought. "Or do you think he’s into, like, threesomes?"

Beside her, Andrea’s eyes widened, and she scooted away from the other girl as color rose in her cheeks. She first scooted toward Levanter, but his leer at Lyaera’s suggestion made Andrea do an about-face and head in the other direction. Unfortunately, this took her right next to Kanuran, who’d lit up a cigarette as soon as the scene had ended. She coughed and whispered, "Excuse me. Excuse me, Mr. Kanuran, sir, could you please ... not ..."

Kanuran’s gaze slid over to her, and Andrea’s quiet voice dried up. She pointed mutely to the "No Smoking" sign on the far wall.

Kanuran grunted and extinguished the cigarette on the ‘temple’ wall.

Levanter chuckled and headed over to their corner. "Caught by Miss Manners, huh, shorty?" Andrea flinched as he reached down and ruffled her hair. "Come on, let’s go grab a beer."

Kanuran grunted and followed Levanter out.

"Are you going to a bar? Like, could I come with you?" Lyaera asked eagerly, springing up from her cross-legged position. "I got a new fake ID last week. It’s from a guy who’s supposed to be, like, really good. I promise I won’t get thrown out this time ..." Her voice faded from hearing as she followed the men out of the door.

Andrea straightened up from her cringing position as the fearsome presences faded. She looked around, and saw Buran soothing Sid as he looked in a pocket mirror.

"It’s not a wrinkle, Sidrick, it’s just your skin folding. It has to go somewhere when you smile," Buran explained in a calm and steady voice as Sid contorted his face into a grin that looked more like a rictus of pain.

Sid didn’t seem to hear Buran, and was muttering, "Eighty. I play an eighty-year-old. Why did I think it was a good idea to let Mr. McNeil say my character was eighty?" The words were somewhat distorted, as he continued to pull back his lips and grimace at his reflection.

"No one thinks you’re your character, Sidrick," Buran reassured him. "The fans don’t think you’re old, just like they don’t think that Lyson is a satanic summoner."

"But I am -"

"Can I go home with you?" Andrea blurted. Buran and Sid looked up, Buran with a curious frown and Sid with his frozen grin. "I just ... we went kind of late, and it’s really dark ..."

Buran’s face softened into a gentle smile. "Of course, Andrea. We’ll go get a nice dinner and then I’ll drive you home." He laid an arm around both of his charges’ shoulders, and guided them to the parking lot.

Nexus looked up from peeling off the final piece of her suit, kicking the metal boot off and sending it clanging into a corner. "Fuck, that feels good." She seemed to notice the emptiness of the set for the first time. "Huh. Fuck. Guess it’s just you and me, huh, kid?" she asked, looking over at Lyson.

Lyson was sitting morosely in the corner, petting Presea. The wolfhound, still wearing her clip-on wings, panted softly.

"Oooookay. Guess it’s just me." Nexus shrugged and headed out the door, muttering to herself. "I wonder if Erazema wants to grab a drink. Bitch is hot for me, I know it ..."

In the silent, dark room, Lyson scratched Presea behind her ears and sighed. "I wish someone would believe me."

Presea whined and looked over her shoulder. After the slamming of the outer door echoed and then quieted, she opened her mouth.

Smoke poured out of her jaws, thick and sulfurous. "YOU KNOW THE HUMANS WILL NEVER BELIEVE YOU, LYSON," came out in a guttural voice, just shy of a roar. "IT COMFORTS THEM TO DISMISS THE SUPERNATURAL AS MERE FANTASY, SO THAT THEY MAY SLEEP AT NIGHT AND NOT FEAR THE DARK."

Lyson sighed. "I know, I just feel lonely sometimes." He smiled at his hellhound. "But I’ve got you, don’t I, Presea? Come on, how about we get some treats?"

"YES," Presea growled in agreement. "THEY ARE AN ACCEPTABLE SUBSTITUTE TO CRUNCHING DOWN ON THE BONES OF INNOCENTS. CAN WE GET THE PUP-PERONI ONES?"

"Sure thing." Lyson patted Presea’s head as they walked, leaving the set behind them silent and dark.