posted by ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sigelphoenix at 11:57am on 27/03/2008 under anti-emo, bpal, office monkeying, personal stuff
sigelphoenix at 11:57am on 27/03/2008 under anti-emo, bpal, office monkeying, personal stuffFinding a lot of reasons to be in a bad mood today. The complaints themselves are more or less legitimate, but the bad mood isn't justified. So I'm going to modify ![[insanejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/ij-userinfo.gif)
shadawyn's happy list and see if I can't get rid of this grumpiness.
1. I think I'm getting sick. I felt the maybe-beginnings of symptoms last night, but convinced myself I was being paranoid. Now the maybe-beginnings are becoming plain old beginnings. And I really, really don't want to spend my weekend sick, missing out on the plans I've made (i.e., Widow*Con).
BUT - I haven't collapsed yet. It will be unpleasant to slog my way through the workday when I'm feeling slow and fuzzy (unless I want to take sick leave, but I'm running dangerously low again), but after I go home I can sleep all evening if I need to. It's not like when I was a student, and "home" did not mean "rest" because homework was hanging over my head. In the meantime, I will fortify myself with tea, oranges, and vitamin C supplements. And, if need be, I can take tomorrow off from work. So I have options.
2. If I do spend tonight (and possibly tomorrow) resting and warding off sickness, I won't be able to get to do the things I planned: working out at the gym, writing more of the new fic I started, or finishing any of my sketches.
BUT - I am eager to do creative activities, and that's a wonderful thing. Also, I can work on these things at Widow*Con, because we'll all be sitting around being geeks anyway (well, maybe not fic writing, since I don't have a laptop - but I can make notes). As for the gym - well, a day off of exercise is nice, in moderation!
3. On a more srs bizness note: I am getting less inspired with my job as time goes on. My job is one of those catch-all positions that supports other staff members, and one of the disadvantages of that is that it fluctuates between boring tedium and everyone (coworkers and callers) saying, "Can you help me with _____" at once. I ... know I'm not in the best mood at the moment, and I'm being influenced by the fact that I don't want to be in the office right now, but I'm pretty sure I don't want to be here after 2008.
BUT - I repeat, I have options. In the short-term, my supervisor is open to suggestions I have for taking on duties with higher levels of responsibility and engagement. In the long-term, I'm in a good position for finding a new job - I can network and find a different position within the School, or possibly the University. Even if that doesn't work, I'm in a steady job that will not end on someone else's determination, which is a good place to be while job-hunting.
4. Related to the above complaint: sometimes I really hate people. This position is pretty light on customer service, relatively speaking, so I've been able to tolerate it for much longer than I would otherwise. Still, it gets to me, after the hojillionth stupid/rude/entitled caller.
BUT - hoboy does it give me marketable skills. Being able to talk down angry parents of rejected applicants, or keep from metaphorically ripping the head off of bigwigs with their heads up their asses, are important skills to have, even beyond the "customer service" field. Too much is too much - which is one of the reasons I don't think I'll be at this job after this year - but for now, I can use it to my advantage.
5. I'm pretty sure my growing apathy for my job is feeding into my ongoing issues with being down/in a rut. If I spend 8 hours of my day doing tedious things, I don't feel like I've learned or been productive, both of which are necessary to fuel my mental energy. Then, I get home, don't accomplish anything, and then take that disappointment with me to the office.
BUT - now that I've identified this cycle, I can do something about it.
ETA: There's no reason I shouldn't have a regular happy list, too.
1. My coworker came to cover the phones while I took my lunch break, and heard me finishing a call with a prospective applicant. It wasn't a particularly bad call, but the person was pretty long-winded and required a lot of step-by-step explaining. Finally, I hung up, and she said to me, "You're very patient." I consider that a high compliment.
2. My lunch contained one of my favorite kinds of bread, combined with delicious Havarti cheese.
3. Today I'm wearing Yerevan, which is my favorite of the BPAL imps I bought fromshadawyn. (I think I've also determined what makes Phantom turn to baby powder on my skin, and I think - knock on wood - that the scents I just ordered will avoid that problem.)
4. I am dressed warmly for the weather, with comfortable clothing and shoes, and still look suitable for a business casual environment (which is not a requirement of my office, but I might as well get into practice now). It's far too difficult for women to achieve both "comfortable" and "professional" at once, so I'm glad I can.
5. I'm rereading Garth Nix's Sabriel, which I first read in middle school, and it's every bit as good as I remember. Sabriel is a wonderful fantasy heroine.
shadawyn's happy list and see if I can't get rid of this grumpiness.1. I think I'm getting sick. I felt the maybe-beginnings of symptoms last night, but convinced myself I was being paranoid. Now the maybe-beginnings are becoming plain old beginnings. And I really, really don't want to spend my weekend sick, missing out on the plans I've made (i.e., Widow*Con).
BUT - I haven't collapsed yet. It will be unpleasant to slog my way through the workday when I'm feeling slow and fuzzy (unless I want to take sick leave, but I'm running dangerously low again), but after I go home I can sleep all evening if I need to. It's not like when I was a student, and "home" did not mean "rest" because homework was hanging over my head. In the meantime, I will fortify myself with tea, oranges, and vitamin C supplements. And, if need be, I can take tomorrow off from work. So I have options.
2. If I do spend tonight (and possibly tomorrow) resting and warding off sickness, I won't be able to get to do the things I planned: working out at the gym, writing more of the new fic I started, or finishing any of my sketches.
BUT - I am eager to do creative activities, and that's a wonderful thing. Also, I can work on these things at Widow*Con, because we'll all be sitting around being geeks anyway (well, maybe not fic writing, since I don't have a laptop - but I can make notes). As for the gym - well, a day off of exercise is nice, in moderation!
3. On a more srs bizness note: I am getting less inspired with my job as time goes on. My job is one of those catch-all positions that supports other staff members, and one of the disadvantages of that is that it fluctuates between boring tedium and everyone (coworkers and callers) saying, "Can you help me with _____" at once. I ... know I'm not in the best mood at the moment, and I'm being influenced by the fact that I don't want to be in the office right now, but I'm pretty sure I don't want to be here after 2008.
BUT - I repeat, I have options. In the short-term, my supervisor is open to suggestions I have for taking on duties with higher levels of responsibility and engagement. In the long-term, I'm in a good position for finding a new job - I can network and find a different position within the School, or possibly the University. Even if that doesn't work, I'm in a steady job that will not end on someone else's determination, which is a good place to be while job-hunting.
4. Related to the above complaint: sometimes I really hate people. This position is pretty light on customer service, relatively speaking, so I've been able to tolerate it for much longer than I would otherwise. Still, it gets to me, after the hojillionth stupid/rude/entitled caller.
BUT - hoboy does it give me marketable skills. Being able to talk down angry parents of rejected applicants, or keep from metaphorically ripping the head off of bigwigs with their heads up their asses, are important skills to have, even beyond the "customer service" field. Too much is too much - which is one of the reasons I don't think I'll be at this job after this year - but for now, I can use it to my advantage.
5. I'm pretty sure my growing apathy for my job is feeding into my ongoing issues with being down/in a rut. If I spend 8 hours of my day doing tedious things, I don't feel like I've learned or been productive, both of which are necessary to fuel my mental energy. Then, I get home, don't accomplish anything, and then take that disappointment with me to the office.
BUT - now that I've identified this cycle, I can do something about it.
ETA: There's no reason I shouldn't have a regular happy list, too.
1. My coworker came to cover the phones while I took my lunch break, and heard me finishing a call with a prospective applicant. It wasn't a particularly bad call, but the person was pretty long-winded and required a lot of step-by-step explaining. Finally, I hung up, and she said to me, "You're very patient." I consider that a high compliment.
2. My lunch contained one of my favorite kinds of bread, combined with delicious Havarti cheese.
3. Today I'm wearing Yerevan, which is my favorite of the BPAL imps I bought from
shadawyn. (I think I've also determined what makes Phantom turn to baby powder on my skin, and I think - knock on wood - that the scents I just ordered will avoid that problem.)4. I am dressed warmly for the weather, with comfortable clothing and shoes, and still look suitable for a business casual environment (which is not a requirement of my office, but I might as well get into practice now). It's far too difficult for women to achieve both "comfortable" and "professional" at once, so I'm glad I can.
5. I'm rereading Garth Nix's Sabriel, which I first read in middle school, and it's every bit as good as I remember. Sabriel is a wonderful fantasy heroine.
tired
(no subject)
And while relaxation is definitely good, I've actually found that going to the gym sometimes makes me feel better when I'm sick -- so if you feel up to it, you might give that a try? Something about getting all your blood pumping and such.
Ugh on the job. When I worked for Jeff, I spent about one week doing the customer service thing, because Conor was in Vegas at a Trade Show. They tried to give me Conor's job, later, for better pay, and man did I not want it. And all I had to deal with was people who wanted to know where the hell their carolina panther's bath mat was. I can't imagine the anger of rejected-applicants' parents >< blaaah
I'm glad you have good options there, though, for getting out. Not liking your job totally drags your mood down, the rest of the time.
(no subject)
Thank you for the well-wishes! I'm hoping to cut it off before it becomes full-blown sick. I may end up taking your advice on going to the gym - if I'm still in a state of head-fuzziness but not wanna-lay-down-and-die by the end of the day, I can see a workout being helpful.
Customer service at the school has generally been much better than my customer service experience at a business, so on any given day it probably isn't as bad as what you did. I do know that I don't want to be here for much longer, though ...
(no subject)
but it sounds like you're already thinking about where your next move will take you, which is good! That's a huge positive step. Good luck on the search!
(no subject)
I think making the decision to be proactive and make a change is already helping lift some of the weight.
(no subject)
2) I have so many digital portable writing devices it's not funny (it really isn't...), and you can use one of them if you get a fic writing bug ;)
3-5, especially 5) Yeah, recently they changed the strategy we use at work, and while one part of me was like "arrrg this is going to take longer and I have a rhythm down" there was also the "oh good, now I have to use my brain again."
Best of luck with finding another position within your company, or without :) You're in a good position to do just that.
---
I like how you turned the list around. It's helpful when you're down in the dumps to see that you have options and a plan to get out.
(no subject)
And thanks for the good wishes. I'll let you know how the job hunt goes.
(no subject)
Of course you'd like the scent that is discontinued the best ;) I should have warned you about that (but there are others out there that smell similar...).
(no subject)